Talk to me about the pro-dom work. What is it?
It's the boy version of being a dominatrix. I'm a fantasy facilitator and am skilled in a whole range of fetish activities. People come to me because they have a particular fantasy that they want to live out or a specific activity that they want to learn more about. In addition to helping to turn peoples fantasies into reality, I also do a lot of education. I work with both individuals and couples and provide practical hands-on education to help them up their game.
Who is your typical client?
My clients come from a diversity of backgrounds and ages. I see men, women and trans folk of all stripes. The unifying characteristic that most of my clients have is respect and a desire to learn or to push themselves.
Tell me about your sexuality?
I'm queer and have partners from all over the gender spectrum. I identify strongly as kinky, it's perhaps the biggest driving force in my sexuality.
What do you like best about Seattle?
Being surrounded by the mountains and having the opportunity to visit remote wild places that are only a day trip from the city.
What’s your favorite piece of trivia about the city?
Lou Grahm, Seattle's most famous madam, was a key figure in rebuilding after the Great Seattle Fire and also responsible for starting perhaps the city's finest brothel. She worked closely with businessmen and politicians and it's said that all local officials didn't pay when visiting her brothel/parlor house.
By now, almost everyone has read or seen 50 Shades of Gray. Is being a fetish specialist anything like it's made out to be in the movies or TV?
I hate to say it but I haven't read or watched 50 Shades of Gray. However, as far as I know neither of the characters are professionals. In more general terms people who do pro-dom or fetish work are consistently portrayed as female even through it is genderless role. Additionally, pop culture don't show the relationships, intimacy, and vulnerability that are present in the relationships that I have with my clients.
What’re the best three things about being a pro-dom?
Best three things are getting paid to do something I am passionate about, working for myself, and having the opportunity to create meaningful and intense connections. Oh and I love theater and the opportunity to perform.
At what age is a man sexiest?
Across the whole spectrum of age there are many different things I find attractive and it's rare that one person will have them all. Older men are much better conversationalists. When it comes to hanging out, there is something to be said for good conversation. Overall I'd say that a man is sexiest when he knows what he wants and can communicate that clearly.
What's the most important quality to you in a client?
Respectful, willing to push themselves, trust – although that is developed over time. Overall having the ability to communicate is key. There's nothing sexier than someone who knows what they want and how to ask for it.
What do you do when you aren’t seeing clients?
I spend a lot time exercising - trail running, rock climbing. I like to use my body and spend time outdoors. I also run a leather working business. I started several years ago because i couldn't afford the toys I wanted. Primarily I make kinky toys. Whips, floggers, handcuffs, restraints, and some non-kinky things like bags, pouches, and the occasional purse. If I'm not making things or climbing I can probably be found in the park with my nose buried in a book.
You are a big climber, right? What’s the most thrilling part of that?
The chance to discover new places and the way that climbing gives me the skill set and confidence to go places where not that many people can be. Through this I get to access wilder and more remote places and see the beauty of the world, especially places that are less touched by people. Additionally the community around climbing, both at the gym and outdoors, is awesome. I enjoy participating in the community aspect and also value the relationships that I have with my climbing partners. There's a certain type of intimacy that comes from totally relying on someone else to keep you safe.
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